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Poetry >> Truth (for the New Year) [29 Jan 2006|04:59pm]

smileypillsbury
[ mood | creative ]

Truth,
small marine decapod crustaceans, lettuce, carrots, bean sprouts, sweet basil and vermicelli,
served with a house sauce, packed and wrapped tightly between soft rice wrappers.

Fresh,
rolls dipped in plum ectasy,
burning passion through my blood stream.

Seaweed,
salad lightly tossed in soy and sesame based dressing,
quenching every last taste bud of my appetite.


Winter,
dificient of heat,
struggling to slow down our tempo, making us rigid and inflexible,
yet we remain unbroken as we march on.

Surveyors,
fine tuning our equipment to encompass the elaborate landscapes lying before our eyes,
luscious feasts imploring our appetites to relentlessly prey upon one another voraciously upon rest.

Hands,
clasped together like tentacles,
smooth and fine to the touch, yet unwavering,
a tightly knit chain to keep us strong and healthy.


Pucks,
sliding back and forth,
cascading over a drawn-out temporal stasis of hydrogen and oxygen,
constantly searching, striving to score points, a goal.

Cheers,
flow from the stands,
as my hand massages the small of your back,
every inch of you electrifying my senses, causing my heart to race.

I strive to keep my heart under control these days,
for there are ways I would like to keep it racing around you,
as long as I don't end me up in the emergency room.


In the beginning,
I was energized by your presense,
your were the inspiration that kept the creative juices flowing.

Now,
I've had to take sabbaticals,
immerse myself in your essense, in order to find a new voice.

You've changed me,
made me want to be more than I thought I could be,
so I figured it was about time I praised thee.


Everyday,
you smile surrounds me, it protects me,
and makes me feel so damn lucky.

However,
this isn't meant to be a sappy love poem,
but a piece of poetic flare,
a way to show I care and to show you that you still arouse the hairs all over my skin.

Your skin,
soft as newborn blossoms untouched by human hands,
our breaths, forcing goosebumps to the surface, as floral acrobats waft and glide,
slowing to a halt, on the curves and rolling arches of your upper body.


You,
are my most famous dish,
long rice noodles stir-fried chicken, shrimp with egg, bean sprouts, Thai turnips, scallions,
all topped with ground peanuts.

If I was allergic to you,
I would still devour you,
enjoying after last bite,
as my taste buds achieve maximum escape velocity.

But,
I would never leave,
I would stay stuck in your gravitational pull,
engulfed by your wonderful kisses,
enjoying all that makes you so,
wonderful,
amazing,
beautiful.

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Everything that has happened before will happen again. [08 Aug 2005|11:34am]

smileypillsbury
[ mood | thoughtful ]

"Everything that has happened before will happen again."

Seems like a crazy statement usually spouted by prophets or religious fanatics. In reality, it is a clear representation of the things people believe to be visions of our future, our past, our destiny, for we are all selfish individuals who believe the universe revolves around us.

We are the suns, everyone else happens to be the helpless planets, countless celestial bodies caught in our gravity, and light so beautiful that someone or something wants to get close to it, but if they get too close, they burn, but if they find a way to keep their distance, they harness the necessary treasures we have to offer.

But I digress, I've strayed from my point that psychics, prophets, and religious fanatics have it right.
They have the foresight to be looking anywhere but here. They can't predict our future, only see remnants and glimpses of some other alternate future. For noone can know how everything in their lives, in everyone's lives, in this galaxy, in this universe, will all turn out.


See there are zillions of universes out there, revolving around their own suns.
We all just happen to be in touch with each of them in the randomest ways. Everytime we daydream, contemplate, run scenarious through our heads, or even write down stories or poems, we are just stealing moments from someone, somewhere else.

Every dream is real, Somewhere.
Every movie is still running, never having ended after the scene faded and the credits ran free.
Every book never truly has the ending we are told, it just happens to have been not as interesting as where the author decided to cut its thread.

But i'm losing you, letting myself free, and stealing another's me moment happening somewhere else in another universe right now. See he's saying the exact words that I am, and perhaps he stole them from me, but I stole them from him, and it is an endless looping of stealing separated by the way his Earth spins a bit faster, and ours a bit slower, not exactly in sync, but enough for us to get a sneak peek into each other's lives.

It may seem a bit confusing, and crazy, but really we aren't lazy. We are just explorers, taking every moment when we are not forced to produce, to expand our horizons and be celestial voyeurs into other people's lives.

Its insane to think that geniuses really aren't that special and brilliant, that they just happen to be more perceptive than most at shoplifting great ideas from other places and claiming them to be there own.


Night of the Living Dead? It happened, and still is happening.
Kerry is president, and the World Trade Center was never bombed.
Its crazy to think that we grab on to another place, another time, and use them to help us widdle our lives to match there's. I'm sure John Kerry ran for president, due to the multitude of visions in his head, where he saw it all happening, and figured it was manifest destiny, when really he was just borrowing the moment.

Porn movies, are disgusting to some, invigorating to others, but just come to be common place on a world where a pizza boy, really is waiting for his blowjob and a nice threesome with some young college girls.
But one night, he's gonna have a dream, where he is gonna believe he is at work, is going to deliver a pizza, and some young college co-ed is going to hand him $20 bill, and wish him a nice evening.
No sexual interludes, just cold hard, cash.

He'll wake from his nightmare and thank whatever God, Goddess, or pantheon of spirtual beings he believes in, that today his dream won't come true, he will go to work and get laid, and his world will keep spinning for some porn director to make into the next big blockbuster to appear in the back room of a local video store.


Right now.
I'm cleptomaniacing all of this from a conglomerate of DaveSmiley's on other worlds near and far, but all of you,
all of you that aren't thinking, that aren't analyzing,
that are just listening to the sound of my voice.

You are having original moments. Original moments, that some other version of you, or some random person you will never meet is writing down to be the next best novel to appear on sale online at Amazon.com. Cause things we find to be boring, could be fascinating to someone elsewhere, and things we find exciting, could just be common every tasks that need to get done.

In conclusion, Stewie Griffin is real, the Simpsons are flesh and blood, right now Superman is flying to save some dansel in distress, and all we have to do is just sit here, enjoy the normality (by our own standards), and remember that if superheroes exist, porn is real somewhere, and everything we do is being seen by someone somewhere else, then we should just keep enjoying what we are doing and make the moments as memorable as possible, for wisdom and brilliance are all in the eyes of the beholder, and our actions really can change the world. Even if it may not be our own that we may end up, changing.

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Poetry :: Vacation - Part One rev. 4 [31 Jul 2005|10:48pm]

smileypillsbury
[ mood | creative ]

Part One

Vacation:
The American Heritage Dictionary defines a vacation as:
"a period of time devoted to pleasure, rest, or relaxation, especially one with pay granted to an employee".
Webster's however defines it as:
"a period in which activity or work is suspended; specifically: an interval between judicial terms".

Both definitions seem to work best, specificaly in relation to life being a vacation.
See God could be seen as the boss, and each of us as his/her employees,
for since the beginning of time, he/she realized we were not ready for the work of angel, or graveling, or even that of a grim reaper.
We were given the gift of a vacation, before our arduous judgement sessions, and final assignment as temporary employees in the service of the universe, God, existence,

See death is the temp job, and when we finally finish our time doing whatever work is needed in the background of the wonderful theme park of "Life", we get another vacation, a one way trip back to play in the place we helped keep functioning.

Yes, a vacation. See God didn't kick Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden, and tell them to go pay rent,
he just opened the doors to show them what else was out there, and someone accidently locked the doors on their way out.

The key, it was lost,
and locksmiths, hadn't even been thought up yet,
so Adam and Eve kept wandering farther and farther away, until all the birds they had named had eaten up their breadcrumbs and they couldn't find there way back home.

Assuming the vacation was over, thinking they had done something wrong, Adam and Eve started their own civilization, set up rules, and started to make a new life for themselves, losing track of the real purpose of life itself --
To be fruitful and multiply. Now that to me is a vacation.

However, we think there is more, so we erect structures to our greatness, theme parks for our own entertainment, and work ourselves harder and harder, in order to get the newest toys, gadgets, automobiles, and even the ability to create our own paradises, our own edens, our own vacation spots away from turmoil,

Lost within the struggle to find ourselves, be healthy, create a family, find acceptance, have a place to call our own, and a job to pay for it, we stop embracing the beauty that surrounds us.

We ignore the subtle intricacies of how the sun, sets,
the sky burns, the day turns to night, and how pinholes are poked into the curtain pulled over our eyes,
only to reveal the light beyond, our future temporary jobs, sealed tight by tiny engineers, plastering the cracks in time for the sun to rise.

Never enjoying the way the wind moves across our skin, as though our loved ones passed, are able to tell us things will always be alright. Perhaps they are just telling us to relax, that we should open our eyes, and enjoy the gift we have been given.

Hinting to us that life really is a vacation, we all just don't have begun to understand how to fully enjoy it enough.

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I'd like to take a moment [31 Jul 2005|04:45pm]

smileypillsbury
[ mood | creative ]

I'd like to take a moment to speak about someone near and dear to my heart,
ME.

That's right Me. And yes I have done it in the past, with some psychadelic hip-skip-hop-be-bop hallabaloo, but now im ready to just come straight out and tell you...

I'm Me, that is all i am gonna be, and if you don't like it, i'm no longer sorry, cause I have realized that I am not a bad person, and there's nothing wrong with,
Me.

i may not listen,
i may be impatient,
i may snore in my sleep,
i may even dissapear for hours on end to play video games on my computer, and wall myself up in a cold dark damp basement with a large screen tv, but you gotta deal with it, cause it is,
Me.

And perhaps I come off a bit crazy,
but you see thats,
Me.

Maybe this is rant of selfish proportions to explain to you, that sometimes, you have to stand up for what you believe in, and today that is,
Me.


Now I would like to take a moment and get sensitive on your punk asses, and show you that I am a nice, sweet, romantic, and utterly caring individual, who loves everyone, small puppies, and of course,
Me.

Ok it didn't last long, but I've realized that too many people try so damn hard to please everyone else, that they never truly please themselves, and that's a problem with people who are nice, cause you have to learn to find a balance, you have to learn to respect yourself, you have learn to just be like,
Me.

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Life [13 Jun 2005|09:06am]

smileypillsbury
[ mood | creative ]

I've heard you can't really be aware of beauty,
or even appreciate it appropriately, unless you have seen true darkness.

Nightmares are my darkness.
Breaching celestial planes of status quo, to visit worlds of twisted ideals, distorted only by our own personal quandries,

Dreams are my quandries,
Warped by the mind's natural requirement, to analyze the events of previous solar rotations, invisible magicians spinning swirling marble feats of grandeur, existing in simultaneous seconds revolving within yet another magician's palm, at speeds where a lifetime goes by with a giant, CRUNCH.

( Read more... )

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Poetic >> Something a bit different... [25 Apr 2005|03:56pm]

smileypillsbury
[ mood | creative ]

Read this at an open mic and was thinking of submitting it to a local anthology. thoughts?

p.s. some parts have changed but I wanted to show you it as it is to get some really great feedback.


MP3 of the Poem

the poemCollapse )

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Poetic >> Inspiration (Rev for Easter) [27 Mar 2005|04:31pm]

smileypillsbury
[ mood | inspired ]

in... spIR... RRATION.

an easter egg,
of desire,

a moment,
of ecstasy,

a temptress,
that makes me,
want to preach.

caught in infinite loops,
of desperation.


Wait...
i am preaching,
i am breaching,
i am cutting open
the stomachs of hypocrisy.

no wait,
HIPPOS-GONE-CRAZY!

tearing the intestines,
of democracy,
from the bellies,
of politicians
who would be our saviors.

read moreCollapse )

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Oh Valetine's Day [20 Feb 2005|01:25pm]

smileypillsbury
[ mood | loved ]

Oh Valentine’s Day.
a nearly perfect concept,
strangled by peer pressure,
and capitalistic sentiment.

how can the idea,
of one solemn day
where a country,
can bond together
to show love,
to one another,
become a devastating blow
to even the strongest
of individuals
in our society.


to me,
it is a day
like any other,
minus the enormous
pressure of billions of dollars
of school yard intimidation
through advertising and guilt.


could it be,
that the holiday
is the one and only
"get out of jail free" card
existing in this competitive
multi-ruled game of monopoly?


consider the idea
that Saint Valentine
was attempting a coo
of the grandest proportions!

one which
for one day,
allows all single
men and women
to expose their feelings
to public discretion,
on a day,
when we all feel
the loneliest.


we can all shout
from the rooftops of 7-11s,
in neighborhoods where you
would normally be
shot by metallic offenses,
get shot by cupid’s warm defenses.

a day,
protected by chubby
cherub assassins,
of love.

and fees,
so simple,
oozing truth,
being real,
being one’s self,
for even a brief time.


me?
i have always
been single on this day,
but not this year.

the chubby bastards
are too busy to bend time
and space to slow my day,
allow me the freedom,
to join the masses,
in scented passions
for maidens of distant castles.


stress overwhelms my senses,
brings tension to otherwise
happy relaxations,
on a day where
it shouldn’t really matter.


for when you
love someone,
one day,
dictated by
commercialism,
shouldn’t rule
your heart,
your mind,
but be like
any other day.


we,
the non-single individuals,
should smile.


we have our princesses,
we have our princes,
and a single day
shared by billions,
shouldn’t make
any difference.


she,
is overcome,
by unfortunate
circumstances,
as i struggle,
to warp cosmos,
breaths, strides,
towards scented delights,
while purchasing nourishment
for comedic romantic feats,
silver screen magic,
chocolate indulgence.


she,
doesn’t deserve,
the aggravation,
only pure enjoyment.


so I kiss her,
my lips,
gently caressing,
re-tracing, painting,
etching her mouth,
permanently into my soul.


doubt,
enters my thoughts,
confirmations launched,
foreign missiles fired,
all intercepting
my worries.

hand-crafted
Italian leather,
covering unwritten
pages of creativity
and possibility.


when i am
with her,
i remember,
that everyday,
is a valentine’s day,
i will never forget.

1 comment|post comment

[05 Feb 2005|09:32am]
koolbeanz4u
oh sry hightlight my thing cuz there are words in black sorry
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[05 Feb 2005|09:28am]
koolbeanz4u
[ mood | relaxed ]

Loveless Murder Love can only be true hearts break deaths occur only true lovable things are the right mind of hope and destiny can ibe living a world through pain and suffering and still belive that only things that are turly right happen to other ppl and things hurtful and worng doing come to me only things that can be determind is the ture thing i would loveto have can pain be indure as much as i have indure so much sufering in my head seeing rude unjustifed things going on killings murders shootings and deaths all round but no one really minds that they have no potential of getting a gun to yourhead and beign shot right there on the ground or maybe you would gt shot and never have to see a day light or sun or a drop a rain fall onyour face but to the ppl that live in depressed life can understand pain and angry and mis judge or missed used ppl only right americans be sufferd to have beloved ppl die infront of your eyes never to return but then you take the sharp knifeto your wrist and cut so deep it hurts you fall on the floor no more pain or dejustifying the unliving we will come to your bed side and tell you that we love you but onislty we have no love pain is not to be or to say we love you only to make ppl that feel love loved even more can i have a moment to my self to have a quite hour before i go insane not to much to ask but a little inmortallty would be pleasnt a little quite there and here would be a great thing but that will never happen you must cut the write of theones you love die tonight or never be loved how can u think im being tortured in my own body by ppl i thought i loved could heart ache and heart break be the same or is that just no t fair or could you have dreams but have no time to despair the need of time to open your eyes take a breath and relaxyours eyes lay down the body the one you loved and set aside the fear is gone come to me now lil girl i will not harm the one i love look into the eyes that are closed and whipser in the heres i love you so could i been told to do so or shall this be a dream i far to be told i will wake up with sweat on my face my pillows soaked in with it i was dreaming a terrible drem i dremt i died a long time ago i think i did die a slow painful one i was shot in the head with a pistol or a gun i can no longer take it i will grabthe gun adn shot my self in the head pain is not fear to ppl that want it it a fear to ppl who resent it i shall die a sorrow death come to the lord has takin my breath tears of saddness run down the faces of ppl who cared so much i have no life to despies me i will not consider th is obinding me for i did die that sad sad night i killed myself with a shallow knife the cold blade runs in my wriste im dying now i cant resite take me lord i know it time i shall join you forthat this is my fare well to you im into the light passed the meadows up so high i will begenning a new life with a new soul with a new life death was on my mind that night when i slit my write and fell to sleep my very last words where i will be here forever and ever dont let me cry i shall not wither oh god plz take me now i have cut my wriste and have forsaken hell i can not dream my last drem it was the dream i went away to a bright light of in the way i can not move my body is till im so cold my body is still oh god will plz tell me how to help my soul be forsaken i need to be forgin of the fogotten sonfor oh my lord i have been wrong i wias cut morder or killed in my sleep a cut on my wriste with a bloddy sheet oh god this is not write i was murder tis not right oh lord this is my last wrod ho this will be my only one i can not breath or see my hands it a dark place where i stand losd imscared hold me close im losing my life to the holy ghost lord or lord plz help me no lord shame me for im not going to that place i was killed lord in my sleep with a bloddy knife and a bloddy sheet can i control this i will ohbin my lord an i will wither away for lord i was murder that sad evening i laid in bed sleeping asound when some old man killed me now i lay on my bed bloddy sheets and a knife in my head oh this is the way i die in the dream i drent last night...... here ya go tell me if you like it plz thanks!!!

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[06 Jan 2005|10:51pm]

sittingwithnick
In all these failed attempts to write I was sure that someday I could catch eyes of inspiration.


a simple car ride. skiping 3rd gear driving around, driving no wear, boys night out was on in the back round but we missed everyword, the lights passed, and reflected across your eyes.

the music in the backround would cover up any of the silence
as i try to steal your rings off your fingers.
holding you close just moments before keeping you warms on the swings.
the stars burned so dimly against the black sky

this night could of lasted forever,
our breathe froze but we kept eachother warm
I stood behind you arms around yours as you sat on that plastic swing
the stars burned so dimly against the black sky
but the night was still beautful and the moon would be our only light.

we ran back to the car, legs numb and frozen enough to not want to bare.
the music in the backround would cover up any of the silence
as i try to steal your rings off your fingers.


lets stop and tell stories of enchanted nights
about a girl and a boy that dares to live in a dreams
cuddling in the car holding close to body heat
as he tried to steal her rings of her delicate fingers
the music kept the silence at bay a soft daze or green from dash board

ahh i wish i could write, Ive been trying so hard to make this poem last
working up to what i once was able to do. Chris Allso was a mentor but died all to soon

A green daze grew from the dashboard. lighting the car seat in the dim light car
parked in an empty parking lot.
this was an enchanted story.
On this night as fairies fell back to sleep
hiding from cold
this night would alway go on with a calm quiet breeze. rocked them both to sleep
the windows started to fog from all the heat, as they cuddled across the front seat
he tried to steal her rings.
a sterling sence of a dream
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FOREVER INTO THE DISTANT BLUE [21 Dec 2004|04:25am]

trivking_64
FOREVER INTO THE DISTANT BLUE
(T. Beechey)

Amidst the boundless astral plain,amongst the myriad drops of rain,
Between the moon and sun I've danced in a ceaseless quest to seek romance
But I just had to turn to find that what I sought was right behind
To take my hand and guide me through forever into the distant blue

Within her eyes,therein lies what shade and shadow can't disguise
All that is so pure and true,like when the dawn embarks anew
Spilling forth in lustrous rays,sifting through the mist and haze
Allowing for another chance to glimpse the world at flawless glance
And the images which have been drawn supply the strength to carry on
Over once untrodden ground as time's fabric grows unwound
Hers is truly a lyrical soul - lifting me up,filling the role
Of someone whom I used to know...it seems so very long ago

But also yet,in a way,there remains a sense of yesterday
For but a fleeting twinkling once,I relished the flavors of these wants
I savored every precious drop then,all too soon,it came to stop
Ever since I've longed and yearned for those moments to return
To cast aside shrouds of gloom and breathe in airs of sweet perfume
Nestled in rich bouquets of water lilies by the bay
Just simple pleasures,priceless treasures ---springing forth in spacious measures
Gone not to be revised...till I found the beauty in her eyes

Reviving faith,renewing hope,smoothing out each hill and slope
Granting chance to chances lost regardless of the cause or cost
A time to bask within the rays of playful,carefree summer days
And capture at their greatest heights passions borne on winter heights
Revealed to all,concealed to none --- the time to heal has begun
And I never thought I would see when such a time would come to me
I'm comforted so by its warming glow,more than anyone could ever know
Casting reflections below,above,and all around in hues of love

Now,as anguish goes,I've chance to dose --- at last,a moment for repose
For I've grown weary in my quest,my wounded soul beckons request
The mirrored portraits in her eyes reflect upon the earth and skies
Across the glass I fanitly trace a misplaced smile upon my face
When I awake I've come to see these dreams of smiles have come to be
For,within my heart,we are as one in the presence of the setting sun
Underneath a velvet mystic sky as clouded mists go rolling by
Upon a crystalled span of sea awash in sheer tranquility

And,all around,there is no sound --- not even a echoed whisper found
Just she and I within a world so unbridled and unfurled
Her poetic gaze I praise in song as,with the winds,we drift along
Past and beyond the skyline view...forever into the distant blue
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Never Give Your Life to Someone Who Ruins Them. [26 Nov 2004|07:20pm]

my_misfortune
[ mood | creative ]

Never Give Your Life to Someone who Ruins Lives

Never give your life,
To someone who ruins lives,
Who takes them for their own,
Enjoyment.
Which is done often.
He loves to take advantage,
All the time.
With a sly grin,
Like a fox.

Never give you life,
To a scary life eater.
Your sweet, loving
Life will,
Never be the same.
He will make sure you never love again,
And make sure of it.
When slowly destroy you,
And then send you packing.

If you ever find yourself
In love
With a person that ruins lives,
These things,
You must do:

Run as fast as you can,
As far as you can go.
Let him go get some other girl,
The next time he tries to get
Close to you,
Tell him you’re to good for him.

Keep him away from loved ones,
But give him the,
Dislikes
And tell him to go.


Now go
Get a ticket,
As fast as you can,
To the most beautiful spa,
Under his name,
And credit card.


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Hate [26 Nov 2004|07:16pm]

my_misfortune
[ mood | crappy ]

I hate the way you look and stare,
I hate the way you complain in despair.
I hate it when you go out at night.
I hate it when we shout and fight.
I hate it while I sit and wait, while you become a flake.
I hate it when I never hear your voice.
I hate it when you just pack up and go.
But most of all I hate it when you just leave me alone.

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The Journey [21 Nov 2004|02:53am]

trivking_64
THE JOURNEY

A moment lingers,stealthly clinging to space
Where time can't erase the inevitable essence
Its presence is felt,but often seldom accepted
Within the decrepit walls of incandescence

Where the light which travels unravels each second
Even as voices beckoned to be restored
They're ignored as,undaunted,the dimming continues
And the hues reflected now angle toward

An image unseen,yet encaptured fully
And so duly noted upon each who surveys
Within each gaze of wonder,the thunder rumbles
And crumbles facades of bygone days

Leaving behind just the stains of madness
As the strains of sadness resonate
Not waiting for entry; they arrive uninvited
As each lighted realm does dissipate

Till blackness surrounds and sounds have fallen
To mere sullen murmurs of echoing screams
Thus the dreams are silenced,amidst violent pauses
Which causes revisions of storybook themes
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SUNRISE [17 Nov 2004|11:11am]

trivking_64
SUNRISE

Sunrise,peeking slowly through the trees
Bring me another day to share
Sunrise,with your warm and gentle breeze
Show me just how much you care

Oh,can you read my mind?
Can you take away the pain?
Erase all of my yesterdays
And let me start again

Sunrise,collect up all my dreams
Turn them into something real
Sunrise,sew up all my seams
Close my wounds and let them heal

Let me knoe the truth
That's concealed behind the lies
Reveal to me the answers
And blaze them across the skies

Sunrise,breathe new life into my soul
Tell me that I am not wrong
Sunrise,help me fulfill my role
Let me know that I belong

Give to me a reason
That I should carry on
Welcome and caress me
With each refreshing dawn

(Instrumental Break)

Unlock all of your mysteries
That have so long been known
Confide in me your secrets
You already know my own

Sunrise,cast all shadows to the side
Light my path so I can see
Sunrise,be my guardian and guide
Take me where I want to be...
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Where I Am [13 Nov 2004|12:25pm]

trivking_64
Somewhere a light flickers,way off in the distance
Yet there is a resistance between that light and me
For I yearn to see the world in its glowing
Still,I can't help knowing that it's not meant to be

But I can dream and imagine all of the splendor
The tender caresses of light on my face
In a place of comfort and deep introspection
Where the only direction is directly toward grace

I have dreamed of this moment forever and always
Through this maze I've traveled beyond and below
And that glow,it's now closer that ever
But I'll never partake of its radiant flow

For I'm destined to stay forever shrouded
Behind clouded remnants of a dream overdue
Where you don't exist and I'm quickly forgotten
So,beneath the rotten timbers,I view

As that distant light flickers,just beyond my grasping
And the moments lapsing increase over time
Till they climb beyond possible reaching
Thus teaching a lesson only known to the mime
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The Things I Meant To Say [05 Nov 2004|05:21am]

trivking_64
THE THINGS I MEANT TO SAY
(T. Beechey)

It seems that,lately,all I have spinning 'round my head,
Are all the itty bitty things I never ever said,
So many times I wanted to and countless times I tried,
But who knows why? It seems I kept them locked inside,
Days turned to weeks,then months and years,soon a lifetime passed,
And what remains are endless tears instead of smiles to last,
Oh,I'd give everything I had for another day,
To hold you close and whisper those things I meant to say.

I meant to say "Good morning" each time you awoke; I meant to say "How are you" whenever we spoke,
I meant to say "You're special" when no one seemed to care; I meant to say "I thank you" for being there,
I meant to say "I'll help you" no matter what the task; I meant to say "I'll listen" to each question you'd ask,
I meant to say "You helped me" for answers you'd give; I meant to say "Cause of you" for reasons that I live.

So many things I meant to say but something always got in the way,
Now no one's here to hear a word and so these things will not be heard,
But they echo daily in my mind and so I find myself resigned,
To listen as my conscience sings these intended but unuttered things.

I meant to say "I'm sorry" when I was wrong; I meant to say "Don't worry" when roads ahead seemed long,
I meant to say "I'll lead you" when you couldn't find the road; I meant to say "I'll take it" when you couldn't bear the load,
I meant to say nothing at all each time I'd complain; I meant to say "I'll shield you" from every drop of rain,
I meant to say "Forgive me" for each tear you'd cry; I meant to say "Give me one chance to tell you why."

So many things I meant to say but something always got in the way,
Now no one's here to hear a word and so these things will not be heard,
What was I thinking? Why'd I wait? I know it now but now's too late,
My heart lies bare with broken strings atop a mound of voiceless things.

I meant to say "I'll find it" when all you sought was time; I meant to say "I'll pull you" over each uphill climb,
I meant to say "Take my hand" as each road began to slant; I meant to say "Yes,you can" when you said you can't,
I meant to say "We did it" as we passed each test; I meant to say "It's over" when we'd find time to rest,
I meant to say "Here's the key" to secrets I keep; I meant to say "Dream sweetly" as you closed your eyes to sleep.

So many things I meant to say but something always got in the way,
Now no one's here to hear a word and so these things will not be heard,
Except by me from the morning sun until the day is finally done,
Yes,now you're gone and each day brings to mind these never-spoken things.

It seems that,lately,all I have rolling through my brain,
Are all the teeny,weeny things I'll never say again,
The things I should have said to the one I was with,
And all those misspent moments that have faded into myth,
So many things I meant to say but something always got in the way,
Now no one's here to hear a word and so these things will not be heard,
Sometimes,at night,your name I'll call to a faded frame on a shaded wall ---
I meant to say "I love you,"
I meant to say "I love you,"
I meant to say "I love you,"
And that one hurts the most of all.
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La-la-la Not really poetic, buuutt it works! [18 Aug 2004|12:31pm]

my_misfortune
[ mood | geeky ]

I want to lay in the back of a pick up truck, with a pillow and a blanket. Have who ever owns it, drive around while I lay in the back looking up at the stars, to feel like I'm flying.

I want to feel the wind go flowing through my hair.

I want to be a dreamer.

I wish to fly.

I wish to run with the horses.

I want to run, run far away..where no one can touch me.

I want to be rebellious.

I want to go play with the stars.


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F is for Flame [09 Aug 2004|02:32pm]

awry_fighting78
[ mood | okay ]

I sit here calling out for help
But no one hears my cries
The fire’s growing close to me
Before my very eyes

My face feels like it's melting
My hands, it seems, are too
I'm coughing from a sickly smoke
Which turns the sky from blue

The heavens once so clean and pure
Now, are clearly not
Darkened with the awful smoke
From this inferno burning hot

I spot a person, moving
Someone coming through the flame
There's a man who's yelling something
He's calling out my name

He was kneeling by my side
When everything went black
The next thing that I know
I'm in a stretcher, on my back

Just then I start to worry
and I ask the nurse who's near
"Where's the guy who found me,
Can you bring him here?"

She tells me that he saved me
That I'm lucky I'm alive
That the man, he tried to get me out
And that the man did not survive

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